Fear the Darnedest Thing!

At times everyone is gripped by a some level of fear.fear

You know that tightening of the stomach, the inner dread, the tensing of the body, the sweaty hands or the extreme case of ‘which way do I run’.

Fear can be overpowering and debilitating.

So, what is fear?

First, there is the real fear of personal safety. This is our natural built in fight or flight response. A healthy thing to have in extreme cases where your personal safety is in jeopardy. In these rare cases, thinking stops and your natural inner wisdom kicks in to guide you. You might not agree with me. However from the safety of this moment, most people think they know what they will do but, I can attest from personal experience you will do the unexpected.

But what about all the fears that are built around the “what if” story? You know, the story that begins with: “What if I don’t know what to say? What if I make the wrong decision? What if it snows? What if she doesn’t like it? What if I fail?”

I bet you can come up with your own list of “what if’s”.

This kind of fear is only a thought. It has no form, it has no substance, it’s nothing but the creation of our own thinking.

Most fears arise from the unknown. They are aimed some future event that may or may not ever happen. They are fears based on shadows created through thinking. We are create a story through thinking and then believe it. Once we believe this thinking our body, which doesn’t know the difference between real physical fear or a thought created story, reacts by going into fight or flight mode, hence the physical sensations.

The result of these stories are stress, staying stuck in repeated patterns, and an inability to move forward.

But there is a way out!

Every time you notice yourself caught up in a “what if” story, pause, take a deep breathe and then ask yourself where is the fear.

As you begin to notice your ‘what if’ stories, you may also notice that you are less stressed and are able to take steps towards a different way of being.

Don’t get upset or beat yourself up if these stories keep popping up. That is normal. I know that if you keep watching the stories they will disappear all by themselves. You don’t have to do anything other than pay attention one step at a time.

If you are ready to go deeper into an understanding of the 3 Principles check out my one-to-one mentoring, join my monthly talks (Edmonton), come to a full-day workshop or book me for a full-day workshop.  

Until next time,
Be in Joy one step at a time,

Opening the door for fresh new ideas!

I notice at the end of the year I was in a very low place. I was tired, grumpy, unhappy and ovdoorerall miserable. Intuitively, I knew that something had to change. But as often happens when we are operating from our thinking rather than from the spacing between the thinking, we feel that we can’t make a decision.

For me it was no different, I played around with different scenarios. I batted around the pros and cons. I stirred up financial insecurities. I even played the “what if” game.

An interesting aspect of all of this, is that I was bouncing between tired and miserable versus loving what I was doing and enjoying it. I was actually watching myself fluctuate between the highs and lows of my thinking.

About the same time I was introduced to Michael A. Singer’s book The Surrender Experiment where he shares his experiment of surrendering to the flow of life. As the saying goes, when a student is ready the teacher shows up. I feel that this was the case with Michael Singer’s book.

After a particularly difficult week where I reached an all-time low, I decided to stop trying to figure it out and let the universe show me what needed to happen.

I had to get myself out of the way.

I verbally made a declaration to the Universal wisdom that I was ready for change and that I was handing everything over for ‘It’ to figure out.

I was not longer going to try to control the situation and I was open to whatever flowed my way, even if that meant continuing to do the same thing.

The moment I did that I felt a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.

Almost instantly my mood shifted to one of expectation and excitement. Nothing had changed with my situation but, my thinking around the situation had changed.

I began the New Year in exactly the same position I was in at the end of December. My days were very full and I was still juggling many responsibilities.

Two weeks into the new year I attended a holistic networking meeting and came away with a renewed sense of what I wanted to be doing. As I drove home that evening I wondered where I would find the hours to pursue these new opportunities. These thoughts appeared briefly and then moved on.

I was not longer in control.

The next morning I received a text message from a colleague asking me to contact her as soon as possible. I called my colleague and in her words I received my answer from the universe. Due to some changes within our organization, I was going to have to give up some of my responsibilities. I had two weeks within which to make a decision.

I would never have dreamed of this scenario.

In an instant, I knew what my decision was going to be. Later that afternoon, I had a meeting with our director where I indicated what I was ready to let go.

Within the next couple of weeks several things in my life shifted and new opportunities presented themselves. The moment I let go of my thinking blockade and stepped back into the flow of life the path cleared for new opportunities to present themselves.

In the past this process would have been a huge drama with much agonizing, analyzing and discussing. I used to think I had to make things work and know what was best for me. Now I know that if I am in a low state of mind I am caught up in thinking and that I can let those thoughts go which creates space new fresh ideas.

Do you find your self agonizing over decisions and losing sleep over them? Would you like to have clarity of thought? If you answered yes to either questions send me a message and we talk about your options.

Where did that come from?

pexels-photo-mediumEvery one of us have had moments when something happens and we ask, “Where did that come from?”

Perhaps it was an idea, an unusual solution to a problem, or a knowing something you hadn’t seen before.

Or maybe you have faced a difficult situation and had to act quickly but did so with clarity and precision. It could have been a dangerous situation where you noticed you were unnaturally clear and grounded?

In these situations you are anchored in the moment. Your thoughts aren’t racing back to the past or into the future, you’re fully focused on what is happening right now. What happens in these moments doesn’t arise from thinking or planning it comes from somewhere else, from your own inner wisdom, Divine Intelligence or the Field.

This happened to me when I was living in Lesotho when I was mugged by three young men in the middle of the day. What I recall most sharply from that incident was how calm I was, how aware I was of everything in the vicinity, and how I knew what to do. It happened in flash. Before I knew it, the lads were running down the street with their money and I was on my way home with my backpack containing a few things that I asked to keep. After all these years I still can’t believe I negotiate with these guys holding a knife to my neck. Where did that idea come from?

My example is one of the apparent danger although it didn’t feel dangerous. I am sure you have examples where you did something that later may seem foolish but in the moment it was the right thing to do. It is only later that you berated yourself for taking these risks and yet it all turned out just fine.

During these times you are not clouded by overthinking, over analyzing and judgment. You do what you sense is right at that time and in that place.

This doesn’t only happen in difficult or dangerous situations, it happens every day. If you stop and think about it, you could probably make a list of all the things you do in a day effortlessly and intelligently without having to think about them. When you don’t fuss and worry about everything, they show up as something to do and before you know it they are done.

But exact opposite happens when you get caught up in thinking, worrying, and trying to figure things out. When in this state of mind accomplishing any task takes a lot more effort and stress.

Have you noticed this? That it takes a lot longer to do something when you are stressed and over thinking about something.

What do you think life would be like if you could get grounded, stay calm and accomplish everything you wanted to easily and effortlessly?

Understanding how thinking works and that you have a built-in system for success can easy your stress and increase your productivity.

If you are ready to find out more send me an email and we can talk about your needs.

Or you could join me in Peru in April for 14-days experiencing the sight, sounds and taste of Peru as well as deepening your understanding of the 3 Principles.  You will find all the details in Services.

I Am A Miracle!

Mountain viewThis past weekend as I was driving toward the mountains for a conference I was thinking about the concept of the acorn and the tree. How does an acorn know it’s supposed to be a pine or spruce or cedar or Tamarack tree?

By the same token, how does a flower seed know it is supposed to be a rose, daisy or cornflower?

As I pondered the concept of seeds containing the Divine Intelligence to become that which they were meant to be, I had a moment of absolute clarity where I saw the miracle of life within each human. My awareness went from acorns and seeds to the microscopic seed within my mother and the microscopic sperm from my father coming together among the billions of cells in my mother’s body to create that Divine spark of life ~ me. I am that miracle union. I am that seed of Divine intelligence.

What bursted out of my mouth at this realization was, “I am a miracle! I am a miracle!” It was a good thing I was alone in the car for it came in a shout of awe.

In one moment I took a huge leap up in the glass elevator of awareness.  (Michael Neill’s metaphor)

The awareness that I was indeed a miracle lead me to scan my body,  body I have taken for granted for so many years.  My body which knows exactly what it’s supposed to do without me even being aware of it. For example, by lungs and heart know exactly how many breaths to take in minute. They know how to self-regulate without my help. In fact, 90% of the time I’m not even aware I’m breathing. It happens in a beautiful rhythm without me having to do a darn thing. Miraculous!

From my heart and lungs, I considered the billions of cells that know exactly what to do maintain my body. They know when to die, to replicate, to repair, to attack. They are part of the grand plan for me to have a healthy body so I can experience life. All I have to do is give them nourishment and treat then well. Wow!

I considered the rest of my body and realized I have little idea of the amazing things it does each moment.

By this time I had pulled over to the side of the road. I sat still in wonderment, love and gratitude.

Then came the awareness of how I get caught up in thinking, creating stories about life while there is this Divine creation of life happening without my being aware of it. I saw how my thinking tended to keep me recycling the past due to my little mind scanning my memory bank to give meaning to the moment.  Or how this same mind would conjuring up an imaginary future based on what was already in my memory.  While the mind was frantically searching for meaning, there was little room to notice that life was happening all around me in the moment.

At this point I got out of my car and stood on the side of the road letting my gaze take in the vista before and around me. In that gaze, I felt the seed of Divine Intelligence in the grasses, trees, hawk, magpies and the mountains. The Divine life force of all things beating with one heart.

When I eventually arrived at the hotel, I saw my friends and colleagues for the first time. Seeing beyond the story to the source!

This experience was a moment where Mind, Consciousness and Thought flowed together in perfect harmony. Knowing that once you know something, you can’t go back, is a great gift! I may be able to expand on this awareness, but this experience is now a part of me.

The deepening of my awareness of the grandness of life and the joy I find in each day are some of the many gifts I have found in understanding the 3 Principles.

Step back, wait and see!

photo-1441448770220-76743f9e6af6This past week I had the joy of watching the natural flow of events transform someone. It began with a client sharing her ability to step back and not get wrapped up in the stress associated with making the decision to move and trying to control the outcome.

It revolved around her desire to move closer to work which lead to her house hunting. She found one and really wanted it, but she was one of 6 interested in renting. After talking with the owner, she was asked to wait without any assurances. Instead of her usual mental mind games and need to push things forward, my client stepped back and allowed the process to unfold. The waiting became stressless when she let go of the outcome and any thinking around the house. She marvelled at how easy it was to accept that it would be what it would be. Several days later the house was hers.

When we spoke over coffee later she was in awe. Her previous pattern of worry and trying to manipulate the situation didn’t even arise. She had discovered a whole new way of being that was less stressful and more open. This experience took her from an understanding of the Principles to a knowing.

For many us, when we find ourselves in similar situations we immediately get into the indecisive question mode that runs something like this: “What if I don’t get this house? What will I do? Will I be able to find another one like this? How can I get the owner to decide in my favour? Would it help or hinder the decision if I call, just to check?”

Most of us have been taught to believe that in order to get what we want we to have be in control, take action and get things moving. However, if we are up against something that isn’t ready to happen no amount of pushing, guiding or manipulating is going to make it happen. When our efforts are met with resistance it is best to step back, wait and see.

I don’t see this as giving in, rather taking a breather. When we step back from the situation and calm our mind we often see a different way to progress or a whole new way of approaching the situation that is better than the one we initially envisioned. At other times, when we get ourselves out of the way and withdraw our expectations events unfold seamlessly without assistance. It’s as if, once the effort is removed the way is clear for things to happen.

I have seen this happen countless times in my life. Most recently with a decision to once again take groups to Peru. I have been deflecting this request for a couple of years, but recently decided I was ready to lead a journey to Peru with a 3 Principles group. In the past month, I have had moments when I was unsure and saw only difficulties. In those moment I would step back, wait and see. Inevitably, the answer would arrive in some form, someone would appear with help or a totally different door would opened.

Understanding the 3 Principles and how they form the foundation of life relieves us from the stress we create when we keep using strategies that no longer serve us. Seeing with a different perspective requires a clear and quiet mind to tap into Universal Mind, the source of our inner wisdom. This is what my client discovered last week.

If you want to learn more or are ready to go deeper contact me and we can discuss your needs.

If you are interested in the Peru trip, the details will be on my website at the end of this month.

In Joy,
Carolynne

Simple Desires

You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. 
So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.”
Steve Jobs

Follow your passion!follow simple desire

How often have your heard, read or been advised to do this?

But how does one find one’s passion? Maybe they are right in front of you, but you dismiss them as irrelevant, unattainable or a fantasy.

What if your curiosity, interests or desires were clues pointing you toward your passion? After all, passion is a strong feeling or desire.

What if you have a built-in guidance system that is gently moving you along despite any resistance you might be feeling? Perhaps your inner self knows where you need to be going and is guiding you.

Every day you are given subtle signs that gently indicate the next step on the path. They come from your inner wisdom in the form of simple desires.

Often these desires or interests are shrugged off as insignificant and only with hindsight does their real value surface.

In myself, the first evidence of this came in my teens with my passion for books about foreign lands and different cultures. Only later in life, was I able to look back and see that this passion guided me to a  life as a global gypsy and later to working with the immigrant community.

Later, my fascination with shamanism and a desire to know more resulted in me heading off to Peru on an adventure into the world of the shaman. This turned into a 5-year exploration of self while guiding others on spiritual tours through Peru.

My explorations in Peru lead to an interest in quantum physics, neurology, the mind and thoughts, the culmination of all these interests or desires the brought me to the 3 Principles.

When I look back now, I am amazed at all I have done. It happened effortlessly because I allowed my interests and desires guide me forward. I am not saying there weren’t challenges along the way, but with hindsight I know that when I fought the desire I cause a lot of anxiety and stress for myself. However, when I let go and trusted this inner guidance my life moved along smoothly.

It’s very stressful to constantly feel that you don’t know what your passion is. It takes a lot of energy to constantly be evaluating each and everything you do in life trying to figure out if this or that is your passion. When if fact, it could be right there in front of you quietly presenting itself as an interest or desire.

Your inner guidance system is always leading you forward, all you have to do is trust in it. Let go of preconceived ideas of what  life should be like and trust your personal GPS. This will lead you to some amazing places.

It’s all happening perfectly even without your help!

So, don’t fret that you can’t find your passion. Instead, listen to those simple desires and be curious about where they might lead. A new adventure awaits beyond the known.

Aren’t you curious about where your desires will lead you?

A Hole in the Sidewalk.

Life is like a hole in the sidewalk, this metaphor running through Portia Nelson’s poem simply describes how our thinking keeps us trapped in repeated patterns/habits.

This poem could be my autobiography. I would find myself in a situation, blame everyone but myself. Play all kinds of mind games. Finally, my awareness would expand to the point where I could see the hole ahead and choose another path.

This poem represents the 3 Principles in action.

How does it speak to you?

An Autobiography in Five Chapters 
by Portia Nelson

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in. I am lost….I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the side walk.
I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I fall in….it’s a habit…but my eyes are open.
I know where I am. It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 5

I walk down a different street